The pages are still blank, but there is a miraculous feeling of the words being there, written in invisible ink and clamoring to become visible - Vladimir Nabokov

There is no agony like bearing an untold story inside you - Zora Neale Hurston

14 June 2009

Pins and Needles

...That's what I've been like all week, waiting to hear back from Julie and Maz about the book. I've alternated between believing that I'm a terrible writer(and Julie can't even bring herself to finish the first chapter) and thinking that at least I'm a heck of a lot better than the author I'm reading now (I won't name names). The ups and downs are crazy. It's been awful.

Then hint of joy! Julie said she's enjoying it: hating the evil characters, while other characters she wants to see more of in other books; so many scenes are "very visual" and she keeps picturing them... OMG I'm so happy that she's liking it!

I want my readers to feel emotion, to visualise the scenes, to live it, and to see that it's working with Julie is such a thrill. I'm surprised how important it is to me that the book be experienced. Getting it published will be just the icing on the cake, allowing more people out there to read it.

I already have a gazillion ideas for more books. I need time to write! Darn this needing a day job.

Of course, Julie hasn't finished the whole book. Now, I'm really terrified that she'll hate that reversal thing in the middle when everything changes. Oh no, I'm back to being on pins and needles again...

08 June 2009

I'm Out There

I printed out a few copies of the novel, got them nicely wire bound so my test readers can flip through it easily (noticed a few typos and errors after the fact of course), and sent my poor baby out into the world.

Julie, as I planned, got a copy. She said, "Yes! I was hoping to read this. I saw you working on it in the library." I had no idea she was a regular Julie Bond, spying without my knowing. Guess I should have hidden what I was doing better when using the library computer to write during my lunch and tea breaks. Oh well, it was great not to have to twist her arm. Julie is very cool by the way (mild mannered scientist by day--punk/beatnik/hippie by night) and I'm excited to hear her opinion.

The other copy went to a friend of my writing partner (aka my husband) named Maz. She's an actual writer and critic who reviews books, movies etc for websites. I'm utterly terrified to hear what she says. I'm out of Kleenexes and need to buy a few boxes, best to be prepared.

I've also written a query letter and I'm halfway through a synopsis of the book that I can send to agents. It's better if I keep working, rather than worrying about what my test readers will say. Well, I'm worrying too--worrying and working. Excited and terrified too. This is great!